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Showing posts from September, 2014

(Un)worthiness

In my Spiritual Director’s class, we’re reading a book titled, Soul Feast: An Invitation to the Christian Spiritual Life, by Marjorie Thompson. In chapter 3, she gave an example of prayer as conversation:
Another exercise is to write a dialogue with a person from scripture. The following example imagines Jesus as a conversation partner; the writer is identifying with Simon Peter after the miraculous catch of fish (Luke 5:1-11).
ME: Go away from me, Lord, for I am a sinful person!
JESUS: Don’t be afraid; from now on you will be catching people.
M: No, you don’t understand, Lord. You are holy, pure. I’m just a common person with a lot of weaknesses. I don’t belong with you.
J: Remember, you didn’t choose me, I chose you.
M: But why, Lord? I’m not worthy of you!
J: Did I say you had to be worthy? I only ask you to follow me in trust.
This really hit me.
Hard.
I’ve said this often — I feel so unworthy of my calling. When I was about to be ordained, I was given an opportunity to say a few things. I …

Meditation — 22 September 2014

Luke 15:8-10 (CEB): “Or what woman, if she owns ten silver coins and loses one of them, won’t light a lamp and sweep the house, searching her home carefully until she finds it? When she finds it, she calls together her friends and neighbors, saying, ‘Celebrate with me because I’ve found my lost coin.’ In the same way, I tell you, joy breaks out in the presence of God’s angels over one sinner who changes both heart and life.”
“Celebrate with me because I’ve found my lost coin.”
I see a woman in a dark green dress — thick fabric, like denim or hemp — searching desperately through a one room house — rustic, prairie style.
She’s moaning deeply. Hurting. Her pain, very tangible.
She’s searching for the coin.
The room’s getting darker and darker.
She’s becoming more frantic.
She’s spinning, turning over everything, spinning down…
down…
d o w n . . .
the room gets darker
darker
spinning
darker
darker
spinning
collapsing

Weekly Gospel Reflection — 21 September 2014

Matthew 20:1-16 (CEB): “The kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. After he agreed with the workers to pay them a denarion [a day’s wage — j+], he sent them into his vineyard.
“Then he went out around nine in the morning and saw others standing around the marketplace doing nothing. He said to them, ‘You also go into the vineyard, and I’ll pay you whatever is right.’ And they went.
“Again around noon and then at three in the afternoon, he did the same thing. Around five in the afternoon he went and found others standing around, and he said to them, ‘Why are you just standing around here doing nothing all day long?’
“‘Because nobody has hired us,’ they replied.
“He responded, ‘You also go into the vineyard.’
“When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his manager, ‘Call the workers and give them their wages, beginning with the last ones hired and moving on finally to the first.’ When those who were hired at five in t…

Meditation — 15 September 2014

“Love really does make the world go round.”
1Corinthians 13.4-8a (CEB): Love is patient, love is kind, it isn’t jealous, it doesn’t brag, it isn’t arrogant, it isn’t rude, it doesn’t seek its own advantage, it isn’t irritable, it doesn’t keep a record of complaints, it isn’t happy with injustice, but it is happy with the truth. Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
“All you need is love.” Lennon/McCartney
“Only love, only love can leave such a mark      But only love, only love can heal such a scar.” Clayton/Evans/Hewson/Mullen/Lanois/Eno
1John 4.8 (CEB): “...G‑d is Love.”
1Corinthians 13.4-8 (adapted): G‑d is patient. G‑d is kind and isn’t jealous. G‑d doesn’t brag and isn’t arrogant or rude. G‑d doesn’t seek G‑d’s own advantage. G‑d isn’t irritable and doesn’t keep a record of complaints. G‑d isn’t happy with injustice, but is happy with the truth. G‑d puts up with all things, trusts in all things, hopes for all thin…

Weekly Gospel Reflection — 14 September 2014

Matthew 18:21-35 (MSG):* At that point Peter got up the nerve to ask, “Master, how many times do I forgive a brother or sister who hurts me? Seven?”
Jesus replied, “Seven! Hardly. Try seventy times seven.
“The kingdom of God is like a king who decided to square accounts with his servants. As he got under way, one servant was brought before him who had run up a debt of a hundred thousand dollars. He couldn’t pay up, so the king ordered the man, along with his wife, children, and goods, to be auctioned off at the slave market.
“The poor wretch threw himself at the king’s feet and begged, ‘Give me a chance and I’ll pay it all back.’ Touched by his plea, the king let him off, erasing the debt.
“The servant was no sooner out of the room when he came upon one of his fellow servants who owed him ten dollars. He seized him by the throat and demanded, ‘Pay up. Now!’
“The poor wretch threw himself down and begged, ‘Give me a chance and I’ll pay it all back.’ But he wouldn’t do it. He had him arrested…